Outgained 157-18 in the first quarter? Chill out, man. Have to track down a loose ball and complete a prayer on third-and-Ritzville? No problem. Need a game-preserving blocked field goal for the second straight week?
You've come to the right place.
"But we find ways to win, and that's the most important thing."
Ask fellow receiver Levander Segars what he was thinking on the Woodward Field sideline as EWU moved methodically toward the Griz goal line in the final minute. Was he, just by chance, contemplating the consequences of a blown 10-point lead in the final 5:45 that would give EWU the inside track to the conference championship?
Apparently not.
"I was standing next to (tight end) Willie Walden and (running back) JR Waller," Segars said. "I told 'em, 'They're not going to get a touchdown, and we're not going to have to kick a field goal. We're going to block it again.' And Willie said, 'I'll take it.' And that's exactly what happened."
The conference's top scoring teams were locked in a defensive struggle until late in the third quarter, then detonated for a combined 32 points in the final 18 minutes.
Montana's offense sputtered for most of the first half, but after intermission the Griz gave it their best Woody Hayes - they ran the ball effectively, and they stopped the other guys from doing the same.
Still, UM couldn't have won without a pair of jaw-dropping connections from quarterback Craig Ochs to Talmage and Segars.
Talmage made like a ballet dancer on a 27-yard catch late in the second quarter, leaping, twisting and getting one foot in-bounds after adjusting to a slightly underthrown sideline pattern. It turned a third-and-16 hole into a first down at the EWU 16, and on the next play Lex Hilliard put Montana on the board with the first of his three touchdown runs.
Late in the third quarter, facing third-and-8, Ochs tracked down a wayward shotgun formation snap roughly 15 yards behind the line of scrimmage. He eluded one Eagle, stepped up into the path of two more defenders and - despite being crunched - fired a Hail Mary pass down the middle. Segars alertly broke off his route and came back to grab the ball for a 25-yard gain to the EWU 19. Four plays later, Hilliard scored to put UM ahead 21-10.
EWU coach Paul Wulff said it was these plays, and others like them, that crystalized the outcome - right up until the moment linebacker Shane MacInytre stretched a desperate paw on Sheldon Weddle's 28-yard field-goal try.
"We were in position a lot of times, defensively and offensively, to make plays, and we didn't," Wulff said.
Certainly, the Eagles have reason to kick themselves.
Penalties cost them two touchdowns after driving inside the Griz 10-yard line, and interceptions ended two more promising drives. They couldn't take advantage of a huge break in the first half, after recovering a botched squib kick that bounced off a Griz player near midfield. A face-mask penalty helped set up what turned out to be the winning points, Dan Carpenter's 39-yard field goal.
Montana didn't play perfectly either, but the Griz won the turnover battle, committed only two penalties (11 less than last week) and, despite surrendering 446 yards, retained their title as Rulers of the Red Zone.
Eastern became the fourth team to outgain the Griz and lose. The line forms on the right, guys.
For Montana, the chances of winning or sharing a seventh straight Big Sky title look a whole lot better now than they did 24 hours ago. Since the Grizzlies rose to national prominence in 1989, they've lost five times to EWU, three more than any other current Big Sky member. So this one, on the road, made a nice catch for the creel.
But there are still plenty of ways to stumble, even with a favorable schedule that sends UM to Portland State in two Saturdays before returning home to close out the conference slate against Northern Arizona, Sacramento State and Montana State.
You don't have to possess the memory of an elephant to recall the last two years, when losses to the Bobcats cost the Griz outright league titles - and more favorable playoff pairings.
"It's always nervous time, your heart is beating a mile a minute," said Hilliard, who powered UM's improving ground game with a career-high 116 yards. "We're closer to where we want to be, but we're not there yet."
Of that, we can be positive.
Rial Cummings can be reached at 523-5255 or by e-mail at rcummings@missoulian.com. His column appears Sundays.
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